I thought I would write this late because I did not want everyone to have to read through my essay.
I met Steve around 2005 when I first got out of the hospital with my own injury. We met at the Univerisity exercise program where he was still walking laps on the running track. At that time he knew where his disability would go but was always full of energy and smiles. We quickly got in the habit of going for coffee after the exercise program.
He was always full of compliments for his two daughters who were on their way to completing their respective schooling. He also boosted of his wife's skills too. This was all Steve. The family man who did not need too many outside friends because he had family. Family was everything to him and he wanted so desperately to help them in any way he could. I never met the other people of his household but I did see the smile on his face on the days he brought Megan to the exercise program. He would try a little harder on these days as if to show off that he was still in the fight to be as good as he could be for his family. Each time I think of him I think of the boxers stance he would take in his wheelchair with the hands moving as if he was Mohammad Ali in a boxing match. I may not be able to walk but I can still fight on....
Despite the fighter in him, I still think of him as a gentle soul. He had his opinions but seldom spoke badly of others even when in a fight with them. He choose to keep quiet much of the time because he was not the type to start a fight or even continue one.
I could tell he was deeply bothered about being marginalised in his family and without any way of helping them. In the end he moved out of the house to help his family in the only way he knew possible. His daughter Megan was having problems going up the stairs and had fallen a number of times. At the same time the modifications to the house looked to have stalled out and there was no way to move her to the top floor. He knew he may be hated for the move out but he knew it was also for the best for the family. Megan could have his room and the tension in the family would reduce with him gone. He acted for the best of the family although he knew it would not go down well.
I am upset that I was not able to see him off in the end. He passed away so much faster than I expected and I miss that last talk with him. I am glad that his family as it was could be there as he passed away. That would be all that he wanted. He knew his time was coming and that must be a tough thing for anyone to think about as he lay there. I hope we meet again.
Wednesday February 7, 2018 at 2:42 pm